Libra Men: Partners or Players?

Libra is the sign of partnership and balance. People with several planets in Libra tend to be diplomatic, sociable and communicative. People who were born when the sun was in Libra, are idealistic, fair-minded and alternately intense and blase (all that balance makes them express both sides of the spectrum from time to time). Libra men and women are notorious flirts. Not so much because they adore attention, like Saggitarians, but because they are naturally sociable and flighty, they know how to flatter, and they move quickly from one thing to another, not liking to dig too deeply or become embroiled in nasty and empassioned disagreements. (This lasts until their solar progression moves into Scorpio, at which point they become incredibly stubborn and empassioned themselves, but that is the subject of a different article entirely.)

Libra men are a breed unto themselves. They are the guys who dated every pretty girl in high school or college (or desperately wanted to), never managed to have their heart broken (or appeared that way anyway) and could charm the pants off of all their mothers at the same time. They manage to carefully navigate the fine line between being loving, yet mischevious, boyfriends without alienating their core group of guy friends, whose friendship they depend on both for companionship (they hate to be alone) and as a necessary backdrop to all their romantic overtures (otherwise they might appear foppish). This leads to two types of adult Libra men: the perfect partner and the incurable player. Most Libra men are on a lifelong quest for that perfect “other”. It is how they go about it that defines which group they fall into. Let’s analyze some well known examples.

THE PLAYERS: America watched several years ago in absolute horror as C list musician Eric Benet, who had miraculously landed A list acress and beauty Leo Halle Berry, cheated on her publicly with random ex-girlfriends. Unfortunately the confused Libra player is prone to such behavior, loving the idea of monogamy, but unable to change his behavoir even after vows have been exhanged. The same horrid behavoir was shown by TV star Mario Lopez, when he was divorced by his wife of three weeks, Cancer Ali Landry (whom he had dated for six years), when she learned of his chronic unfaithfulness, including a daliance with a stripper days before their union. Some other legendary Hollywood lotharios have been Libra men. In the 1990s, seemingly not a single woman could rise to fame without finding herself in bed with flavor of the decade Eric Stoltz (Taurus Cher, Gemini Helen Hunt, Aries Robin Wright, Aquarius Bridget Fonda, et al) and Jeff Goldblum who has slept with everyone from Aquarius Geena Davis to Pisces Sharon Stone and Virgo Nicole Richie. The most famous present day Libra lothario is singer John Mayer whose list includes, deep breath, Leo Vanessa Carlton, Gemini Heidi Klum, Pisces Jennifer Love Hewitt, Cancer Jessica Simpson, Virgo Cameron Diaz and who boasted to Rolling Stone Magazine that he “slept with, like, three girls in a week” on tour. Only the indulgent Cancer man and lusty Aries lover can match the Libra man in number of conquests.

THE PARTNERS: This is a different breed of Libra man. In the past few years Hollywood hotties like Scorpio Julia Roberts and Aquarius Jennifer Aniston have publicly coo-ed over their beautiful co-star Clive Owen, yet he remains happily married and has stated publicly his disgust with those who cave in to on-set flings. In the 1990s it would have been hard to imagine more obsessed-over teen heartthrobs than Kirk Cameron and Luke Perry, yet both of these men settled down immediately with relatively un-famous wives to start families rather than “indulge” in the millions of mall-rats who swooned over them. It still remains to be seen if their 2000s-era counterpart, young Libra Zac Efron, will fall into the parter or player category. Multi-talented icon Will Smith, is the poster-child for perfect Hollywood husband, doting constantly on his wife of ten years, Virgo Jada Pinkett and their two children, and refering to her as “the boss”. Tim Robbins has also been a loving partner to his lady of the past two decades, fellow Libra Susan Sarandon. And though Russell Simmons marriage to Taurus Kimora Lee Simmons has folded, he typifies the perfect partner, involving her in all aspects of their joint business Baby Phat. Sacha Baron Cohen is one of the most innovative and celebrated comedians of the past decade, yet rather than play the field he has avoided the spotlight and has been settled for the past five years with Aquarius fiancee Isla Fisher.

And then there are the amazing Libra men that manage to pull of being both partners and players (both extremes again, I know). Matt Damon falls somewhere in between, as he dated around quite a lot in Hollywood, including famously dumping Aquarius Minnie Driver during an interview, before falling into happily-ever-after with his cocktail waitress wife. And Eminem’s love/hate relationship with his Capricorn wife Kim Mathers inspired some of the best-selling albums of the century as well as two well-intentioned attemps at matrimony. Michael Douglas has been married for most of his adult life but cheated shamelessly on his first wife, and only finally found true partnership, like many Libra men finally do, with a Libra woman, Catherine Zeta-Jones. Nick Cannon, looking for that perfect partner recently proposed to Aquarius model Selita Ebanks, but just as quickly called it off. Snoop Dog has been married to his high school sweetheart for more than a decade (brief splits have not stuck) while she tolerates him going so far as to star in naughty movies. Tommy Lee falls for hot chicks all the time, but like a true romantic always seems to want to marry them. Viggo Mortensen (who also has a reputation in real life) is the consumate on-screen film hunk who inspire women to cheat on their less romantic but more stable husbands.

All this boils down to that old cliche about men and their relationship with their mothers and the way they were raised. The partnership-oriented Libra men were taught to respect women at an early age. Perhaps they grew up with a single mother or lots of sisters, but in either case they genuinely like and enjoy the company of women. They probably have quite healthy relationships with their mothers. Then there are the Libra players who grew into their Libra personalities in households that were less than ideal. They could have been perfectly happy homes but little Libra didn’t get much attention until he worked hard, or flattered everybody, for it. Or they were unhappy homes where he was forced to play peacemaker between a number of more aggressive types. In either case he took on the burden of keeping everyone happy all the time, and thus his womanizing becomes an extension of this behavoir, as juggling the needs of several people becomes fun and enjoyable.

The truth is that even the player Libra men are desperately desiring that great relationship, it is just a matter of being realistic about their expectations. Libras have high expectations, in both internal and superficial arenas, to the point of being fussy and fault-finding in the extreme. The Chandler Bing character in “Friends”, so brilliantly played by Leo Matthew Perry, is a perfect Libra example, always dating around, always finding fault, as opposed to “no-strings-attached” Joey. It is only when the Libra man distills what he truly desires in a parter that he can narrow his range of vision and find his ideal, and as we have seen, this comes later for some than for others.